I'm not sure what's wrong with me but this feeling of happiness doesn't last long. Perhaps I just can't accept the fact that she will never be with you ever again and it's time for me to move on.
Anyways, I'm just ain't got the mood to be sad or moody or whatever I'm feeling right now. Right now, I have to concentrate on WCA. It's world cup asia( paintball ) and it will be held at KL. I'm going there on the 18th till the 23rd of november which is like three days away. The worst part is that I have to use lots of money and I need to skip four days of school. Let's just hope my attendance won't be that bad.
Looking through my friend's blog and she was talking about her childhood life. It's a very good thing she can remember most of her childhood life but I can't. I can only remember a portion of it. Remember how I get my head injury that is. Stepped on a ball and lost my balance. Fell down head first on this helmet where diver use it during the old times. It hurts like hell and it bleed real bad. Sadly there is only my brother at home so I told him to just wash the blood off and just let it be since I'm so afraid to go to the hospital after the eye incident. I can't remember much of my childhood life. Until now, there will be a dent about 8cm long at my right head. That's why I can remember about the accident. Anyways, wish me luck for WCA and if I do win, HELL YEAH!
After more than two years since we last met, finally, we met each other again. Nothing felt better than that. Seriously, it's just the best feeling I've had in years. Sorry if i had to say it quite a few times, I just like it! When all hopes are lost of meeting her or talking to her ever again, I finally took the courage to tell her how I felt all this time so that I could ease the pain inside me.
It all felt awkward at the start. I'm actually afraid of just typing "Hie" at msn to her. How pathetic can I be but i did it anyways. She replied a few minutes later. That few minutes got me thinking quite a lot of things. Will she reply me back or am I just disturbing her or she just don't want to entertain me. All the negative thoughts run through my mind that I almost want to change my mind of telling her how I felt. While I was busy thinking of stupid stuff she replied back. It's like I'm way back to my secondary school days where I'm afraid to talk to girls. She can make me feel that way so, I bet she must be a special girl to me. I'm just guessing. Anyways, I asked her whether I'm disturbing her and other normal questions about life and stuff. After a few minutes chatting with her I finally told her that I still love her after all this time and my love for her never fades away. She was shocked! She said why I never stop her from leaving when I had the chance back then and I told her everything. I was stupid back then, I know nothing and I don't even know what to do. I suck at relationships back then and I'm still the same now.
I finally told her everything I that I can remember back then. After that, I ask her can we meet for a while and she said why not cause she miss me too. I was like wondering, she misses me? So we set up a date and finally, we did meet up. Her hair has grown longer and she is so beautiful to my eyes. I totally can't believe that I'm meeting her right now. It's like meeting a famous actress. She just came to me and hugged me. I was speechless. It's just so nice to finally meet her and getting a hug from her. If only that moment can be forever, I'll make sure I won't lose her ever again. It's just so different from the other "dates" I'm out with. This is just chilling somewhere and just talk about our life, our past relationship. It was just incredible. Sadly she have to go quite soon cause of, I can't remember what.
It's been a few weeks since we've met and now I have to concentrate on other stuff. WCA. World cup Asia of paintball. It will be held at KL and I'm not 100% fit. I've been having all sorts of injury right now and it's killing me. What I need now is a lot of rest before the competition starts. May I fulfill in getting into the podiom and win at least 3rd position. Until then, I shall update more for you readers who are reading this.
still waiting @ 7:54 AM
